God is Good

So lots has changed in my life and it's all good change. My husband and I have found the most wonderful outlet to have a better relationship with each other. It's like when we first met mixed with knowing each other for over 4 years. I spoke with the Pastor at our church and he gave me some kind of light bulb I had never seen before. Through that my husband and I were able to talk and I mean really talk....now we have restored love, family, communication, intimacy, and God into our life. We have peace in our home and calmness that was much needed. We will be blessed in about 3 weeks with a new baby girl and she needed peace too. My kids act better and feel stability. Life is good and we have God to thank for it all.

Thinking a lot

So lately I have been thinking about my life and current situations. I see my husband and the things he does is actually pretty typical of. A man. They just don't take much action in their child's lives. I know it is morecommonnow to do so however James is kind of old fashioned so it makes sense I take it all on. I am the mom it is myjob and that is also typical of astay at home mom. I am finally after 3 yrs becoming more comfortable in this marriage,more comfortable in my own skin. I think about this 3rd pregnancy too, it came at what seemed like the worst timing, but now it just seems perfect. I am home and have time to spend with our beautiful daughter and I can get E on and off. The bus. Also, I can take care of myself and the baby without added stress which keeps my blood pressure happy. I just think the closer I try to get with God the better I feel about my life all together. I have been thinking as my New Year's resolution I will follow Jesus closer and trust fully in him; I will work on peace in my marriage, and I will love my children and show them that every day. I think marriage is a serious institution and I need to keep it peaceful and sacred. I love my family and I want it to be happy. I am the heart of the home.

so much going on.....

Where to begin.....right now there is just so much going on. We are very excited because on Dec 20th we find out the sex of our 3rd child. Any guesses boy or girl? Then there is the thing that started the day after Thanksgiving. My mother in law hadour kids and there was some miscommunication and James ended up making his Mother very angry, so angry that she beat on his car and spit in his face. That has caused us to decide she may not have the kids alone Dec 10th or Xmas eve, but she can come here. Well needless to sayit has caused much frustration and anger throughout all the in laws. I know our decision is the right one but it bothers me our children miss out on half their family. It has to be thet way and right now all involved are poison to our family sowe have to shut them out. All this stress makes it harder to keep my blood pressure down and sometimes I have trouble sleeping. Also, I am beginning to have an increase in anxiety about losing the baby...why you ask I don't know. I have never miscarried but. All the same I worry. So much to think about and right before Christmas.

The Bump

The Bump

12 weeks

Ok so this may turn into the pregnancy diaries for a little bit but it's my blog so I can do that. Right now I feel crappy most days and I so do not remember that with my other pregnancies. I have a headache most of the time and I am so dog tired I can barely stay awake. I swear I could sleep for days. Then there is the waiting to find out what this kid is! Boy or girl I am just so ready to know. I guess its mostly excitement and I am whining a bit butbut damn it I am pregnant for the 3rd time....I am allowed to whine! I keep thinking about Hayden too. I am pretty sure I will rip a stich because it is hard to resist helping and holding Hayden. It is gonna be an up hill battle for all of us. I am anticipating the good with the bad, I am very excited!

1st trimester

Well baby no 3 is giving me some small problems. Whoever said all pregnancies r different isn't kidding. This time I am having lots of cramping...no worse then menstrual. I just feel crappy. Also, this time I am overwhelmingly tired, I could literally nap all day if I didn't t have Hayden. Also, I am STARVING which leads me to believe I am having a boy. I just don't ever remember being this hungry. Oh well, we are at 7 weeks and not too much to report. All in all pregnancy still isn't that bad....at least I have a reason to eat whatever I want.

In May Makes 3

Well.....ooops we did it again. In May mid May we will be welcoming our 3rd bundle of joy. This was a shock to all of us, we were done. Even though this wasn't the plan, I am very excited to have another sweet little baby. I don't even care if it is a boy or girl...we just want a healthy baby. I know my Eli will take it well....he's a pro at this whole big bro thing, but Hayden worries me. She is the baby girl and she demands lots of attention. This will be a huge adjustment for her. We will her through this and I am sure Hayden will be ok once she realizes this is a new playmate for her.....closer to her own age no doubt.